WHY?

I don't understand why some people have kids? If you don't want them let someone else take care of them. If your only going to inflict pain why do you keep them
It is wrong for you to breed and if you can't control yourself someone else should. 
If I had an animal that ate it's babies then I wouldn't let it have anymore.  The brutal truth is you are selfish, worthless pieces of crap. Stop thinking of just yourself and give up your first child for adoption then go get yourself fixed.
God will judge those who bring harm to innocent children harshly.  If you don't believe there is a Hell read your Bible, go to church, do whatever it takes but stop hurting people. 

Redwing

http://instagram.com/p/GyfKa5wPu-/

No Escape...

Prayer

My wife and I just had 2 of our prayers answered! God works in mysterious ways, he always answers my prayers, it's just sometimes the answer is no or wait. Praise God!

HEY! Social Security are you counting?

I AM! June 27, 2013 will be 1 year since I filed my appeal with the Appeals Council and 6 YEARS since I initially filed my claim for disability! No matter what I do it seems I get reminded of this about every day. There are too many reasons to list but NO MONEY seems to be at the top of the list.
By the way I would like to give a big shoutout to Daley, Debofsky, Bryant, the law firm who lost my case and then refused to file an appeal. Austin McGreal was my attorney who failed to address some very important issues with my medical records which ended up in a DENIAL!
I think that the ALJ having to point out some things Austin should have is a good indicator of incompetence. ALJ Rickert is the one who brought up that I was only a few months away from advanced age(50) and also that none of my numerous debilitating conditions were likely to improve. That tells me 2 things, 1 is my lawyer had his head up his ass and should have been telling the judge that, not the other way around. Number 2 is ALJ Rickert acknowledging these 2 issues alone should have been enough to award me my benefits and backpay.
One last thing to point out is I believe the reason for Daley, Debofsky, Bryant refusing to file my appeal is they would have to admit their mistakes! Why else? All it consists of is a brief explanation of whether the ALJ made any procedural errors. Any errors made by ALJ Rickert was due to my attorney not doing his job and presenting ALL the facts...
I am a Christian with a strong belief in prayer so please, any other believers out there who read this pray for me and all others involved so that the TRUTH will come out.

Governor Quinn considers medical marijuana law.

I keep hearing that people are concerned medical marijuana is going to promote drug use in IL. If it does and I'm not saying it will, so what. I would rather see marijuana promoted than opiate pain medications which I have taken for years.
I will stop the opiates if this law passes. Mine don't ever reach the street but some people sell theirs. So what is worse in the hands of an abuser, a joint or a couple pills that could kill you? Have you ever heard of someone overdosing on pot? Do you think there are some really hard core marijuana addicts out there? Not likely people... Marijuana is not physicly addicting like opiates are and I have never heard of someone killing for a marijuana fix like the freak who walked into a pharmacy and shot 3 people in cold blood for some fucking pills! Really?

Something I Love...

Taking pictures is something that helps relieve my stress and takes my mind off of my problems. Looking for the shot is a big part of it for me. I'm in the process of putting together a short video documenting last years drought. If it is any good maybe I will post it here.

Back to Nature

Stevens Creek Decatur, IL

Decatur, IL

Walking Trail

Walking Trail in Decatur, IL

I don't think so...

Do you know this guy?

Their place, we're just staying with them...

Is it time to go yet...

Not All Bad...

My life is not all bad. I have a beautiful wife who has been like a rock. Not only has she had to deal with the financial hardships she has taken better care of me than I probably even deserve.
I can't let these hardships define my life or control me, and trust me, that's not easy. No matter how down I get I know it could be worse. I also know that if I have faith in God he will provide. I do believe though that there has only been one set of  Footprints in the Sand these last 6 years and they are not mine. 
 The Bible says that life is not fair but there is a reason why we go through trials and tribulations. To say that I have been humbled these past few years is an understatement. 

Footprints in the Sand by Mary Stevenson (Zangare) 

USA

More Fountains

Fountains in Central Park Decatur, IL

The Real Deal...

Here's what really happened people. The ALJ who found me "not credible" and denied my case admitted at my hearing that I was only only a couple months away from advanced age (50), he acknowledged all my conditions were REAL and that I was not going to get any better. 
 ALJ Rickert even told my "attorney" the only question left was the onset date of my disability which determines how much back pay you receive. I have a recording of all this.
If we the American people did our jobs the way our government does theirs we would have been fired a long time ago! 
 How does society look at people who mismanage their money? People with low credit scores and maybe a bankruptcy on their record are looked down on. Why there must be something wrong with them, huh? OK now let's look at just the "State" of Illinois and how they manage "our" money. The only thing Illinois has managed is to screw us and line their own pockets! 

Reminded every day...

The hardest thing about waiting for my Disability is not the effect on me but what it does to my family. Every bill that comes in the mail is a reminder that I don't have an income.
 I think it is time for a confession though, even though it's hard to admit, Administrative Law Judge Gerard Rickert busted me out. He knows now that this has all been a big scam I have been plotting for years. My stable work history and and family life are just props in my scheme to collect $1030 per month for nothing. And the fact that I was making $35,000 a year when I left the workforce was just to throw them. What man wouldn't want to leave their career, go 6 years with no income and wait for that sweet $1030 per month or $12,360 per year! WOW
 Let this be a lesson to all, DON'T TRY TO FOOL THE UNITED STATES GOVERNMENT! They will figure it out and when they do... Look out!
 They knew right from the start this guy is a scammer, he's not fooling us. We know he would much rather sit at home raking in that big 12 grand a year instead of the rewarding career path he was on making 35 grand at last count.

Nightmare with Disability 

I am so fucking freaked out right now I can't stand it. I have only worked 5 months out of the last 6 years! Can you even imagine that? I guess if your a lazy piece of shit your probably OK with that but I'm not...

I have been fighting this shit since August of 2007 when I filed my first claim and was denied. Instead of fighting it I thought maybe I can still work so tried to go back to work. It wasn't that I couldn't find a job it was that I couldn't take a job, there is a helluva difference. My head was so messed from severe sleep deprivation I had suffered for many years which inevitably leads to depression among many other things.

The chronic pain I suffered throughout my body was physically and mentally crippling. I had a history of emergency room visits which I believe it was 2005 after looking back on medical records I saw I had been to the ER at least once a month for a whole year seeking treatment for pain. 

Central Park Fountains